Hell yeah, it’s a goddamn emo teen sad breakup thirsty horny dance party. If you don’t hear it and think “i am 16 again”, what’s the point? We’d have failed. Dance out your teenage longing.
This is the most cohesive collection of all of the biggest, loudest, and most melodic tracks that have been inspiring me this year. And on a personal level, this is proof that I can fully manage a three deck CDJ setup.
Track list is a bit mixed cuz it’s not suuuper clear when something becomes “a mashup” and when it’s “here are two songs playing at the same time for several minutes”. I’ll generally call something a mashup if I start with one song, bring in another, and then take it back out and “finish” with the original song. But if it’s just 1, 1+2, 2, that’s just a long blend?
Enjoy the long blend.
hello friendos time for cozy strem! 😀
this is a loud, noisy, possibly too distracting to be a work music playlist work music playlist. like you need to have more focus today than you’d get from pulling up youtube, but you also don’t exactly need to tackle new problems for that matter. the nightmare youngest sibling of agdqlike and I Hide Down In My Corner Because I Like My Corner. the playlist that made me add hyperpop and drone to the categories list. the playlist version of a speedrun of metroid prime that you immediately had to hit pause on because you got too busy and then had three cups of coffee. a day where you feel like you’re drowning in email and the only way out is through and you need to be enveloped in music mirroring this frenzy and the frenzy may or may not be real. is the game cursed is the speedrun cursed are you cursed these are not the important questions just vibe for a bit.
I’ve been in a perpetual process of self-discovery for about the last decade. I sat in a course I was taking at the time in college, reading an article about the experience of transgender and nonbinary people in Japan, and at that moment something clicked in my head, and I’ve spent the better part of 10 years trying to deny it with various success.
And if you have ever tried to do coursework while also dealing with the revelation that you are likely not the gender you were assigned at birth, it is not easy!
I’ve never been a particularly self-aware person, and so my feelings about anything about myself have been hard to say so far, making this a weird and hard post to write. I’ve been on a journey of self-discovery lately, and like most of the things in my life it’s led me precisely nowhere.
Okay, that’s not necessarily true. It’s led me somewhere, which is a place I didn’t really think I’d be at and, if I’m being honest, which I’m being with strangers on the internet for some reason, it’s a particularly scary one. I don’t like existing in a way where I stand out, I don’t like existing in a way where I feel the need to explain myself. I am nervous just writing this blog post knowing that someone could, with knowledge of my partner in playlists here, pretty easily determine who I am in Real Life™. I don’t like this because it feels like, in a world where most people have the answers to these questions, I still don’t, and even if I do have those answers, the reality is one that opens me up to a life of rejection, hate, and struggle.
But the thought of living a life as a lie is harder one, and the thought that maybe if things are kinda tough for me, they might be easier for someone else like me one day is certainly a nice one.
I don’t have the answers yet. But I feel like I’m getting closer.
Anyways, here is Gender Euphoria, a playlist I made for the moments where I can see a future where I’m comfortable looking in the mirror. They’re still pretty rare, but they feel wonderful when they happen, and I want to share that with you all. This is actually an extremely personal playlist as it’s one that’s sat on my own spotify account for a long time (with some exceptions. My personal one has “Man, I Feel Like a Woman” by Shania Twain on it, and I was NOT going to subject you all to that). But with the one day my cloaking field deactivates being tomorrow [ed. note after checking the date and doubling checking how long this draft has been in my inbox: whoops], I wanted to share with you all a playlist that imagines a slightly better tomorrow, and to share with everyone out there feeling a similar way a moment in time where maybe things feel a little better.
Some of these songs are a little less than euphoric but part of my specific euphoria is imagining a world where I feel like celebrating my journey so here we are.
Also, this playlist currently has the second most Carly Rae Jepsen of any Trash Garbage playlist and if you are wondering why, I have prepared a helpful guide: